Conservatives Believe Trump Travel Expenses are a Conspiracy Against Trump

No, conservatives really are just dumb.

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Donald Ely, 83, a Pennsylvania Republican Party official, had heard the stories of Trump’s travel expenses. But he wasn’t sure he could trust them.“I resented Obama going to all these places overseas, particularly because his agenda was anti-American,” Ely said. “But the way people make up the stories about the Trumps, I don’t know if I believe it. I don’t think it’s accurate.” […]

“I believe that the story exists,” Herstein said. “But the facts in it can’t possibly be right. That absolutely can’t be right. How did Trump spend $10 million in one month and Obama spent $11 million in a year? It defies logic.” […]

“I don’t trust the bookkeepers. I don’t trust the people who say, ‘This president spent X and this president spent Y,’” said Roy Postel, 58, a real estate developer from near Chicago.

That’s right: The conservative response to tallies of what Donald Trump’s trips to Mar-a-Lago and the expense of Secret Service protection for, sigh, Trump Tower, and the conservative response to putting those numbers up against the documented numbers of what the government spent on similar Obama trips, is to say nuh-uh and go buy another “MAGA” hat.

It’s not that they have an explanation for why Trump ought to be allowed to spend more. It’s not that they don’t believe he’s taking the weekend trips. They just think it isn’t costing that amount of taxpayer money because it’s of course more likely to be a media and government conspiracy to say so, just to make their chosen leader look bad.

All right then. So right about now is when we’re going to be exposed to yet another glorious media piece explaining why people just need to listen more to poor Trump voters, because they have economic anxieties and whatnot and they’re not really racist or stupid and it hurts their feelings when people say that so stop doing that.

While they go to their conventions and tell reporters that even the reports of Donald Trump taking vacations on a weekly basis, to much taxpayer expense and local inconvenience, are (insert incoherent bleating noises here).

Oh, you know, these people might just be conspiracy theorists. They may not have the mental capacity to tell between truth and fiction. They may be, and I realize we are treading on dangerous ground here, Among The Stupidest Damn People In America Today. Yes, yes, let’s all fight about whether it’s polite to say that out loud or whether we still have to pretend that these people are just so ravaged by economic anxiety that we must forever be forgiving them for believing conspiracies and disbelieving any and every little thing that might make them feel sad inside.

There’s a whole convention dedicated to proving this theory, by the way. You can go there yourself, and watch. They’re currently discussing whether “World War III” is currently underway, in the form of Muslim infiltration and secret Marxists and non-conservative Americans they just plain don’t like. This isn’t the random mutterings of the assembled, paying crowd—they made a whole official panel dedicated to the theory.

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